I too am Christian, have been for as long as I can remember. I have always had those moments when I feel very close to God, either while praying, listening to Christian music or a random thought popping into my head. I have felt the need to share the joy of Christ with others, to teach those seeking truth and to help people in need. I love children, as does my 13 year old daughter. I have wanted to participate in missions to work in orphanages but just haven’t had the chance to yet. I pray and feel God directing me, inspiring me, and moving me to do His work and will.

In reading/researching about bipolar II I have noticed many people state that they have periods of time thinking or feeling that they are called to do God’s work or have a special purpose in life and that this is a sign or result of bipolar II. I am really struggling with believing that people who feel that God has called them to do His work are only feeling this way because of having bipolar II. Would this mean everyone in the Bible who heard the voice of God instructing them, really didn’t hear him they just imagined it because they were bipolar?

How do you determine if it’s God speaking to you, directing you, answering your prayers, showing you a beautiful creation to touch your heart and put a smile on your face, asking you to help someone in need, giving you the desire to speak to someone and tell them God loves them, or if its your own bipolar mind working against you?

And my second question would be, if it is my own mind, is that really a bad thing? Having a “mental illness” that makes me happy, gives me the desire to help others and teach others of Christ. Doesn’t sound bad at all! Honestly, I couldn’t imagine not living a life like this. I love that I have those Wow God moments where I feel Him moving and working in my life.

I try to picture how Jesus lived. He walked the earth in his last few years caring not for Himself but only for others. Teaching, feeding, healing, comforting. I can only hope that some day these are words that might describe me.

My best friend’s mother was always in and out of mental health hospitals when we were growing up. A few years ago she went off all of her medications saying that God had healed her. She’s an amazing artist, paints, creates, plays a few different instruments. She is whimsical and childlike. A complete joy to be around. She doesn’t work, lives on a very small ss disability benefit. She stocks her cabinets with food and then takes baskets to anyone in need. Holds weekly church services in her living room. Some how became an ordained minister although we really don’t know if it’s for real or if she just printed a name badge and gave herself a title. She does volunteer hospice services for those who are ill and passing. She holds weekly services for women in the local jail, teaching them about God and Christ. She truly believes she is here to do the work of God. She was never like this when she was on her medication. She is a completely different person but is out there doing amazing things. So is she bipolar? Or is she truly called by God to do His work like we read about in the Bible? Did God only call people to do His work all those years ago and now if someone hears God or feels him directing them to drop everything, follow His word and do His work, they are bipolar?

Any thoughts or ideas on this would be greatly appreciated! When I told my therapist I, at times, feel like I want to sell off my belongings and move to South America to do mission work in orphanages she looked at me kind of oddly. But there are people running those orphanages. They are amazing people. Dedicating their lives to helping those children. I guess i just don’t see or understand why wanting to do something great and help others in need is looked upon as being part of an illness. While this wasn’t said to me directly, I almost feel like it’s being thought, “Oh you don’t want to go hold those motherless children and love them when no one else will; that’s just your bipolar talking.”

Amen on arguing against the sickness equals hidden sin stuff. It doesn’t take much to find a works righteousness attitude lurking underneath that. So many Christians find others objectionable just because they choose to sin differently than they do.

My explanation of choice, since I hit fifty, is that I used to be wierd, now I am a curmudgeon and an eccentric.

When it comes to the matter of my mental illness, I have been hurt more by my Christian friends, than by anyone else. I have been told that I don’t have enough faith–ie that I am to blame for my illness because of unbelief on my part. I’ve had people look at me with fixed, plastic smiles on their faces, and rhyme off that familiar verse, “Well, ‘all things work for the good of those who believe in Him and are called according to His purose.’” I suppose that the suggestion here is that if I’m God’s child, and I really love Him, my situation will be magically resolved.

But hands-down, most hurtful of all, is the accusation that I am demon-possessed. I believe that Christians can be OPPRESSED by Satan, and that this can be manifest as a depression. The response to such a situation is prayer. However, we live in a fallen world, and as such, we have to contend with illness–even mental illness. Some depression is organic, plain and simple. This depression is best treated with medication. I am a child of God. I am inhabited by the Holy Spirit–not demons.

I truly pray that attitudes such as these will change in the church.