17
Feb
09

I Just Can’t Resist

BBC News – Wierd Alien Life Forms “May Exist Among Us” http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/7893414.stm

This is news? I’ll let the article speak for itself – resist the urge to “pun” this into the ground, much the same a Leo Kottke does with a sweet melody. Oh, the one-liners that exist in this article alone. Do I have the self-control?

We Don't Have Any Wierd Life Here

What? We don't have wierd life here!

Never mind Mars, alien life may be thriving right here on Earth, a major science conference has heard. Our planet may harbour forms of “weird life” unrelated to life as we know it, according to Professor Paul Davies, a physicist at Arizona State University. Weird life could even be living among us, in forms which we don’t yet recognise, he told the American Association for the Advancement of Science (AAAS) meeting in Chicago.

“We don’t have to go to other planets to find weird life.  It could be right in front of our noses – or even in our noses,” said the physicist.

 

 Nigeria – What? We Don’t Have Gays Here – http://www.pinknews.co.uk/news/articles/2005-11168.html  &  http://www.portalangop.co.ao/motix/en_us/noticias/africa/Gay-Nor-Lesbian-Group-Says-Chief-Ojo-Madueke,97f54524-195e-425c-beff-314b1b51a849.html

This is exactly the reason Nigeria is passing draconian laws against GLBT, same-sex marriage and gay groups – that’s exactly what you do when you don’t have a situation in the first place. Next year, Nigeria will be concentrtating on passing laws against weird, alien life forms since, of course, they have none of those.

 “During our National Consultative Forum, we went out of our way to look for the Gay, Lesbian and Transgender Group but we could not come across Nigerian with such sexuality. If they are an amorphous group, then the question of violence against them does not arise let alone negotiating special rights for them.” 

Oh, yes, if the ilk of Archbishop Akinola were going “out of their way to look” for me, I’d have no difficulty raising my hand. How about you?

His presentation caused a stir when he informed members of the council that the government of Nigeria had been unable to locate persons of gay and sexual orientation, despite concerted efforts by his ministry to include this category of persons in the consultations on the human rights situation in Nigeria.

This kind of reminds me of the Elephant gun joke. Stop me if you’ve heard it. A man in Podunk, Iowa walked around constantly with a huge rifle. A visitor to town asked him what kind of gun it is, to which he replied, “An elephant gun.” “Why in the world would you carry an elephant gun?” “To protect us from elephants, of course,” replied the man. The visitor retorted, “You don’t have elephants in Iowa,” to which the man replied, “See! It’s working.”

We don’t have gays in Nigeria – see it’s working as well here as in Iran.

 

BBC News – Breast-fed Baby Risk Investigated.  http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/7867686.stm?lss

Who would have thought that breast-fed babies posed a risk? Perhaps, Britain needs to invest in some breast-fed baby guns. Nigeria, meanwhile, retorted that they do not have breast-fed babies, which is why they are imposing the death penalty on babies that feed on breasts.

 

CNN – Brittany Spears in Wax. http://www.cnn.com/2009/SHOWBIZ/02/16/redcarpet.closeup/index.html

Perhaps this is so she can step out of a car more “smoothly”. Sorry, I should be flogged for that one.

 

News of the Weird – Titillating Tithing  http://www.newsoftheweird.com/archive/index.html

Episcopal priest Gregory Malia, 43, of Wilkes-Barre, Pa., buys top-dollar champagne at New York City nightclubs, even leaving five-figure tips and treating his favorite waitresses to shopping sprees, according to a December New York Daily News report. Said Malia (who is a hemophiliac and owns a pharmacy devoted to blood-disorder medicine), “I work hard. I make good money. How I spend it, that is my business.” Waitresses interviewed by the Daily News said “Father Greg” is a sweetheart, never doing anything inappropriate, but exceedingly generous, whether alone or with business clients. Said one waitress, “A bad night for him is (a tip of) $5,000.” [New York Daily News, 12-28-09]

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... or, preaching from both ends

WELL, HELLO! YOU’RE HERE.

That's too bad - I'm so sorry. Oh, well, just try to make the best of it. What you'll find here is a variety of essays and ramblings to do with things theological, social, whimsical and, sometimes, all three. I don't write to get famous - trust me, I've been told how futile that would be - but to express myself. I love to communicate and browbeat - ummm, I mean dialogue - about the things I find intriguing. Since you're here, and the door's locked, why don't you stay a while. There's a page bar under the header with links to information about us - I mean me. Don't forget to tell me what you think - in a nice way, I mean.

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